Why is Trust Important?
Trust is the glue that keeps relationships together and moving forward. Without trust, relationships fall apart, grind to a stop, explode, implode, fizzle out etc.
You get the picture. Trust is vital to relationships. But what is trust?
What Trust Looks Like
Trust, in a relationship, is more than being caring and much more than being a nice person. Trust is the ability to connect with another person at a vulnerable level, knowing that I could get hurt yet moving forward anyway.
When we pack up our family, we trust to leave one job and start a new career with a new employer in another town.
We trust when we tell our spouse, “I do,” and we believe that person will be there for us through thick and thin.
We trust when we share our dreams with our close friends, and they validate them and help us find ways to accomplish them.
We trust when we pray to God for help because we are helplessly stuck in an impossible situation, and we believe He will not only hear our prayer, but He will also make a way for us to get through the situation.
What Happens When We Fail To Trust?
Failing to trust can have extreme ramifications both personally and in relationships. Failing to trust is a boundary issue because your approach to life is to accomplish everything yourself. It might sound like this, “Nobody does it like me, so I will do it myself.”
Failing to trust will lead to burnout because the leader cannot let things go and trust others with responsibilities.
When we fail to trust, it could lead to micromanaging or the parenting of other adults.
Failing to trust will lead to isolated behavior and a closed-off life. A closed-off life is void of outside resources.
Learning to Trust
The people you lead will thrive under your leadership when you trust them and give them responsibilities. If you have struggled with trusting others, you might need to dig underneath the surface of your life to see “what is there.” There might be a hidden trauma that has been dormant for years. There might be a character flaw in your life that you have never developed. There might be a risk you have been avoiding because you fear failure or you fear looking stupid in front of others.
What is holding you back from trusting others?
Skills to Learn
Learn to be vulnerable with safe people.
Learn to delegate the bottom 80% of your responsibilities.
Learn to listen to those you lead and validate the fears in their lives.
James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner (2006). A Leader’s Legacy. Jossey-Bass Publishing.
Cloud, Dr. Henry (2009). Changes That Heal: Four Practical Steps To A Happier, Healthier You. Zondervan Publishing.
Cloud, Dr. Henry (2006, January). Integrity, The Courage To Face The Demands Of Reality. Harper-Collins Publishing.
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21 Blog Post in 21 Days
Day 10, December 15, 2021