The Five R’s of Successful Living

Every client I have worked with over the past four years has come to me because they want to be successful in an area of their life (personal, professional, or relational). But what got them to my office (or zoom call) in the first place?

Their Pain Point.

There is a point in everyone’s life when they realize they are incomplete and need honest FEEDBACK or GUIDANCE to reach their full potential. BTW, this is true for me as well, I have my own pain points, and I have GUIDES or EXPERT to help me on my path.

Why do we need a Guide?

We need GUIDES or COACHES in our life because we are incomplete, broken, or in a rut. The Guide or Coach can offer feedback and suggestions to get us to the next level. The feedback usually comes in one of five areas of life. I call them the Five R’s.

The Five R’s of Successful Living

R¹ – RELATIONSHIPS

Life is about relationship—our relationship with God and our relationship with others. When we are out of sync with one of these relationships (spiritual, professional, or personal), it creates stress and tension in our life. Developing and maintaining healthy relationships with God and others brings new resources into our life so we can grow in the areas of life that are weak.

R² – RISK

Life is about taking risks. I’m not suggesting blind risk, but a risk with the potential for growth. Our inability to take a risk keeps us stuck in life and keeps us from substantial growth. Often we stay STUCK in a bad situation because we fear the risk of making a change. Not taking a risk is my story; I stayed stuck for over six years because I was afraid to resign from one position and move to a new career that was better for me. I was scared that I wouldn’t be successful, and that was a real fear. But I had to take the risk!

R³ – RESPONSIBILITIES

Life is about personal responsibility. One of my favorite books is Extreme Ownership, written by a Navy Seal. The author talks about the importance of personal ownership or responsibility for our life. No one is going to care about my problems like I will, and no one is losing sleep about my problems. When we think others care about our problems, we have an ownership problem. I have to own my problems and go to my relationships (or form new relationships) to work at solving my problems. This is how life works.

Here’s a simple way to look at it, suppose I see that my car needs new tires. What if I went home, sat on my couch, prayed for new tires, and then waited for the tires to show up? Can God answer that prayer with new tires? Yes. Will He? Maybe, but probably not. Instead, God has called me to DO and be Responsible (read the Proverbs and consider the Wise, Foolish, and Evil person). So, I see I need new tires; I pray for the wisdom and provision for the new tires, earn money for the new tires, ask my relationships where to get new tires and go to the tire store and purchase tires. It starts with me OWNING my Problems and understanding WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT.

R⁴ – RECREATION

Life is about recreation. God created a beautiful playground we call earth. Something about observing beautiful things recharges us at the Soul level. It could be art, music, nature, or movement. Everyone is different, yet everyone has a type of recreation that connects to their soul. I feel ALIVE when I ride my MT Bike for hours in the woods of Northern Michigan; others might enjoy fishing, boating, relaxing by the ocean, painting, creating music, hiking, etc. Recreation brings energy to our soul, and our soul connects us to our Father in Heaven. It is said in the Bible that Jesus would often go to a place of solitude to pray. Recreation gives us to reflect on ourselves and our Father in heaven.

R⁵ – REST

Our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual parts need to rest. Rest is a responsibility. To be able to rest, we have to say NO to the good in life so we can REST and then say YES to the BEST things in life. Rest has to be planned and protected. Good rest gives us the mental, emotional, and physical energy to accomplish the responsibilities we are called to perform.

Give Yourself An Assessment

Reflect on the five Rs and your life.

Which one are you the weakest in, and which R is your strength?

Do you have a guide or coach to give you feedback on your Rs?

What will you do this week to take responsibility for your Rs?